As I alluded to in previous posts, I tend to want to hibernate in the winter and not do much. Unfortunately, that’s also affected my blog. I know I haven’t been blogging much lately, and what I have blogged hasn’t been the most fascinating stuff in the world. Yeah, you can stop agreeing with me now.
With the new year, I am renewing my commitment to blog more and to not suck at it. Or at least try harder not to suck at it. I have also let my husband talk me into trying a new diet and work out program which only verifies that I have, indeed, lost my mind. But that’s going to have to be a post of its own. Yikes.
I’m also changing my attitude about my relationship with some of my co-workers and the office dynamics around here, which is currently similar to one of the levels of purgatory. As if dealing with some of the attorneys around here wasn’t enough, I’ve got co-workers who seem to revel in drama. If there isn’t enough every day drama going on, they will just make up some. I need a sign in my office that says, “Junior High called, they want their drama back.” Because it’s really that ridiculous.
Recently, the office gossip-monger, whom I have fallen out of favor with, caught wind of a misunderstanding between me and another paralegal. Since we’re adults, the paralegal and I discussed it, cleared the air, and moved on. Even remaining friends – shocking. Once the gossip-monger realized the paralegal wasn’t going to gossip about our discussion, and dared to actually go to lunch with me, she started snubbing the new paralegal. Seriously?
Yes, indeed, I have some mature colleagues around here. It’s like being asked, “Who’s side are you on?” in a 7th grade “fight” that had nothing to do with you. Did you ever get those notes or get asked that question in Junior High? This is essentially the same thing, except with email.
If I had to offer advice to new paralegals or anyone entering into the office environment, besides take lots of notes and CYA, I’d tell them to stay out of the gossip, remain neutral and make up their own mind about who to trust and who not to trust. Personally, I’m going to keep doing what I’m doing: focus on my work, be “office cordial”, and not give a damn what is or isn’t being said.
It’s a lot like Paralegal Hell, who works with female geese on the Death Star, except less Death Star. And thankfully, I don’t have to share work assignments or cases with the geese in my office. I can’t even imagine what that would be like.
What would be your advice for dealing with those “special” co-workers, or how have you handled the “geese” in your life?
Mom-alegal's blog 
Work remotely. Seriously – sounds familiar…not exactly but drama, high-schoolishness…I like working from home so I don’t have to get involved in the office drama. God bless ya for dealing with it regularly.
Ugh, I am so jealous! I’d love to work remotely, but I don’t see that happening with my current set up.
For the record, working with men is fabulous; that blogger was right. I’m the only chick among 9 men, and it’s heaven. I don’t want to work with any more women – ever.
I wholeheartedly agree with you. People need to MIND THEIR OWN BUSINESS. If people wouldn’t enable gossipers to start with, eventually they wouldn’t have anyone to listen to them and they’d stop.
In the past, when there was a woman like that at work, but I didn’t have to work directly with her, then it was real easy to ignore her. When it *was* someone that I had to work with daily (ie: one of my bosses!), I had no problem telling them when a comment was rude, uncalled for or just plain inappropriate – and in a professional way. I also had no problem stating that I was there to get my work done, not gossip about co-workers. Those comments aren’t really liked, but I didn’t care. Anyone who acts like a child is going to get talked to like they’re a child.
It also depends on the personality of the owner or whoever is ultimately in charge. If THEY are gossipy, then you’re pretty much on your own to nip comments in the bud when they happen. If they are NOT gossipy and actually act like an adult most of the time, then at least there is someone who can put the gossiper in her place when said gossiper steps over the line.
It comes back to that people just suck, ya know? Overall, they’re selfish, egotistical, emotionally immature children trapped in adult bodies.
I don’t believe all people suck or even most. There’s just a portion that muck it up for the rest of us!
Being a man, I actually find it pretty easy to avoid the rumor and gossip mill. Being incredibly busy all the time also provides a built-in excuse. If anyone tries to drag me into that, they get a simple “I’m too busy to care” response, and that usually is the end of it.
That’s the attitude to have. No more getting sucked into the BS for me.
When my husband worked as a delivery driver he used to say “Not my route, not my problem.” I try and hold on to that saying in my head.
When we had “that” employee here in my department, I also maintained a “keep your head down and do your job” attitude. I have learned that, in time, these people will get what is coming to them.
I can only hope that what’s coming to them happens – this is a 10+ year person in our firm. It’s astounding they’ve put up with for so long. But karma is a bitch, baby!