Wanted: 3 year old tamer & potty trainer

21 Oct

Work has mellowed out (a teensy bit) this week so I’m back to worrying about my son and how he’s not potty trained.  And how he’s dead set on pushing all of my buttons.  At once.   Once upon a time, I was so excited that he was moving on from the “terrible two’s”.  It was so close I could taste it.  Then somebody said, “Oh, wait until he’s 3.  That’s the worst.”  Whuck?  Why do people wait until you’re at the end of the 2’s stage, and think there’s a light at the end of the tunnel, only to tell you, “Guess what?  That light is a Mack truck & it’s carrying a ton of bricks!  Have fun!”   Yeah, yeah, I know.  Every kid is different.  But seriously, I know a ton of people who complain about the 3’s.  Some mean, rotten person even told me that 4’s were no fun either.   C’mon, we barely got into the 3’s and you’re telling me it gets worse?  Just stab me in the heart and get it over with already.

In all honesty, I really don’t worry about what other people say.  Mr. T is going to do whatever it is he is going to do, and I’ll deal with it.  But, damn, if he isn’t acting like a typical 3 year old lately.  Case in point:  Driving home the other night, he starts whining and says, “Mommy, I wanna go hooommmme.”  (Long, drawn out and whiny.  Did I mention whiny?)  No problem, for once we’re doing what he wants to do.  “Okay, good, because that’s where we’re going.  We’re going home.”  Mr. T took 2 seconds to digest this and then starts, again with the whiny, pathetic voice, “No, I wanna go to schooooolll.”   Super.  Since we’re doing what he said he wanted to do, now he wants to do the opposite.    We’re working with him on the whining, telling him to just ask nicely, and “We can’t hear whining.”   It works once you remind him, but dear Lord, why is whining the default setting on 3 year olds?  Is there an override for that? 

The potty training is simply a battle of the wills at this point.  He’s not willing to do it, so it’s not happening.  And I’m not pushing him.  I know he’ll do it when he’s ready.  Then I get all concerned that maybe I’m not doing enough to get him there.  That’s one of the great things about being a Mommy: you usually worry no matter which course of action you take.  Am I pushing too hard?  Am I not bringing it up enough?  One day he’s asking to use the potty (although not actually going once he’s on it) and other times he wants nothing to do with it.  Nope, totally content to wear Pull-ups.  *sigh*  Seriously, I’m willing to pay someone to potty train him at this point.  Is there a “potty whisperer”? 

(Warning: Rant ahead)  Don’t even get me started on the teacher’s aide who asked me Monday if he had any siblings.  Now, let me say this:  Monday was a particularly bad day, complete with a total meltdown once we got to daycare.  Oh, what fun that was – screaming, pushing, throwing himself on the ground, etc.  I can’t even tell you what he was upset about.  I took him in the bathroom to have a private chat, which then he decided was a great opportunity to throw a plastic footstool.  Awesome.  Needless to say, that was another day that I did NOT get to work in a timely fashion.   So when I picked him up that afternoon, I was greeted with that question from the teacher’s aide.  No, Mr. T doesn’t have siblings.  And he’s not going to have any.  What I should have asked was, “Why?”  But I didn’t.  Even when she said, “Oh, that’s what I thought.”   At the time, I was frazzled, tired and just wanted to go home.  T was running around like a wild hyena and all I wanted to do was corral him to the door & go home.  Once I got in the car, I started thinking, “What the hell did she mean by that?”   Then I started getting pissy and of course, I’m assuming that her thinking T was an only child had a negative connotation.   Screw her, my kid is great.  Yeah, he’s 3 and he likes pushing the limits lately.  But he’s polite, sweet, smart, charming, funny and the cutest frickin’ kid you’ve ever seen.  How many kids say “Excuse me” and smile sweetly every time they fart?  He’s been around other kids on a nearly daily basis since he was 8 weeks old.  He shares, hugs friends when they are upset, and loves playing with his friends on the playground.  He’s also happiest when you’re reading him a book or showing him how to draw shapes.  He’s not missing on anything by not having a sibling and he’s certainly not spoiled.  I’ll be damned if I’m going to have “one of those” kids.  So, Ms. Teachers Aide Who Only Has Known My Kid for a Month, SUCK IT.  (Gee, do you think I’m a bit touchy about it?) 

But he did the coolest thing tonight.  He tried to draw a T for the first time!  And he did an awesome job!  Okay, so T’s aren’t exactly the most challenging of the letters, but I was proud of him.  He said, “I can’t do it, Mommy.”  And then, he did it!   Then he drew a monster truck (of course) and for the first time I can think of, it actually looked like something vaguely resembling a monster truck and not scribbles.   Then he flipped the page and drew a pumpkin – with a smiley face!  So, having a 3 year old isn’t so bad after all.  Maybe I should tape the pumpkin drawing up in my car somewhere to remind me it’s not all whining and meltdowns.

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3 Responses to “Wanted: 3 year old tamer & potty trainer”

  1. Nikki October 22, 2010 at 8:33 am #

    First, my kids were those “one per year” not fully potty trained in 3 year old Sunday school. I’ve always let my kids get it when they get it, and it doesn’t seem to have affected them adversely. Second, all kids go through challenging phases whether they have siblings or not. That aid can suck it.

  2. Cher October 25, 2010 at 11:26 am #

    He’s THREE. That pretty much sums it up right there. And any aide who can’t deal with 3 year olds or 4 year olds or whatever needs to find another line of work. There will be days when T is ridiculousy happy and sweet and days where he’s a little hellion – that’s just how kids are. Having or not having a sibling isn’t going to affect that a bit. Good grief. Having just seen the little bugger, I was VERY impressed with him – his behavior, his speech, how he recognized the pictures and such – just everything. So yeah, she *can* suck it! LOL

  3. Momalegal October 25, 2010 at 5:09 pm #

    She *was* nice about it. I’m sure she could handle him fine, it just bugs me when people think only children are brats. Yeah, some are, and he probably fell in that category that day, but certainly not all the time. Someone the other day said some kid needed a sibling because he was spoiled. Whuck? Yeah, let me spit out another kid just so you’ll be happy with my kid’s behavior. Grr.

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